I've been blessed over the years with teachers who enter my life when I least expect it. Serendipity? Fate? Luck? Your guess is as good as mine. There is an old saying, and I don't know who to quote on it but: "When the student is ready the teacher will appear." What comes to me more and more lately, is how I can take myself out of the game by not being present - by not really listening when I should be, or not really committing to something I probably should.
My trip-up has until recently always been the "what-if" syndrome. What if I decide to do this and that other, more interesting thing comes along. My worry is always that I've committed to something or someone and I don't want to then disappoint them by changing my mind. I like to see things through. Usually though, the only thing that gets me is paralyzed.
Things that Elena Brower, one of my more recent teachers/angels, writes about, really get me to wake up, if even for a few minutes. Yoga classes with her are amazing and in the one Reiki session I gave her, I was literally rocked on my feet when our energies connected. I had to stop and reground myself to continue. What it taught me is how connected we all really are and it caused me to realize how many different ways I feel energy.
And then there is Jorja - my life coach for 3 months. She has an amazing perception for what's going on inside. She said things to me no one ever did before and woke me up to a different form of reality. Big Mind - which she learned from her teacher, Genpo Roshi. I only got a small dose of it but the same thing kept coming back around - awareness. To me, it's akin to Eckhard Tolle's Power of Now.
Where are you now? Are you really present, or are you somewhere else? Physically, you're in the chair, or on the floor or standing in line at the supermarket. But where is your mind? Jamaica? Your grandma's house when you were six? See what I mean? We occupy space that a large percentage of time, is void of our awareness.
Do this - breathe. Take a big breath, hold it for a second, and release it. Do that again with your eyes closed. I mean really do it. Don't think about doing it, participate in your life. You'd be surprised how little real breathing you do. Breathing for shear survival is on auto-pilot. It has to be because we sleep - right? But honest, conscious, deep, soul-filling breathing is an act we can practice that will bring us to the "now". It will snap us into an awareness that usually floats around us like a fog. Let some sunshine in and practice awareness.
Mandala for Aunt Jen -
5 years ago